Armageddon

7.9/10 stinky bananas

Vintage Michael Bay movie. As the kids say, he was in his bag. I may not have used that phrase correctly, but you get the point.

Sending oil drillers to space to blow up an asteroid is so batshit crazy, that it's brilliant. Only a true savant like Michael Bay could've cooked up an idea like that. There is no chance you could teach a measly astronaut to drill a hole. You need a strong blue-collar man like Bruce Willis to detonate a nuclear bomb in space. What a movie.

The ensemble cast is fun as hell. The 30 minute stretch where they assemble the team and run them through training is great.

Bruce Willis is a goddamn rockstar. He carries the movie. His speech in the final act fucking rules.

Unfortunately, as much as I enjoy it, Armageddon is not a perfect film. This movie is so damn long for no damn reason. If they had cut some of the fat, it would've been an exponentially better movie. For example, the Russian space station scene stinks to high heaven. Get rid of it. Boom! Your movie is better, Michael. Just like that.

Anyway, Bruce Willis and Michael Bay were born to make Armageddon together and I'm very grateful that they did. Go watch it.