Leaving Las Vegas

0.9/10 stinky bananas

Preposterous movie. Almost unwatchable. 91% critics score and 85% audience score on rotten tomatoes by the way. Are they trolling? Those scores can't be real. Jail!

Would you like a quick synopsis? A drunk goes to Vegas and continues to be drunk, but this time with a hooker who doesn't want to be lonely. That's it. Nothing of any significance happens for the entire two-hour duration of the movie.

Leaving Las Vegas is a shutoff-the-movie-30-minutes-in type of movie. It fucking stinks. I suffered through the entire thing so hopefully, you don't have to. Thank you, Mr. Stinky Bananas.

Can you believe Nicolas Cage (one of the greatest actors of our generation) won an Oscar for this steaming pile of shit? The Oscars are a joke. He should've won for Ghost Rider or National Treasure. Absolute classics.

Here's the rating breakdown:

• 0.3 points for boobs

• 0.3 points for Nic Cage (because I love him)

• 0.3 points for Nic Cage flipping the blackjack table and going beserk (I laughed)

• Total points - 0.9/10 stinky bananas

Leaving Las Vegas gets two thumbs down and a fart noise.