Avatar

7.7/10 stinky bananas

It's good. Nothing special.

I'll start with what I like because I'm a nice guy.

Stephen Lang is great in this. He plays the stereotypical military Colonel you see in every war movie, but Stephen Lang takes it to another level. Maybe it has something to do with his accent or the fact that he's jacked for an old man. Who knows? He's a badass. Side note: big fighting robots are always cool.

I'm not a big cinematography guy, but I have to admit the landscape shots in the movie are beautiful. Gotta give credit where credit is due.

The best part about Avatar is that it's well paced. Avatar is nearly three hours long and it doesn't drag at all. I just rewatched it. I started the movie at 11:30 at night thinking I was going to pass out an hour in. I never did, I watched it in its entirety with little to no phone breaks. That's legitimately impressive.

Alright, no more Mr. Nice Guy.

The CGI is not that special. Even when I watched it in theatres back in the day, I wasn't blown away... at all. Most of the Avatar stans out there always gush over how great the CGI looks. It ain't nothing to write home about. Avatar nerds can kick rocks.

For the most part, the characters stink. The acting is pretty shit and the characters themselves aren't all that interesting. I didn't give a flying fuck that Sigourney Weaver's character died. Good riddance.

The hair link thing IS FUCKING GROSS. It gives me the heebie-jeebies just thinking about it. What the fuck are those little tentacle thingys coming out of their ponytails? Yuck.

Watch it if you want, I don't care.